Bundling up
Well the weather is getting colder, even here down in the South. So I figure its time for me to get something warm to wear. A new coat would be really nice, and I like fur! The way it brushes against my skin.
So anyway I head on down to this place I know of that sells fur and guess what. It's surrounded by a bunch of silly protesters with signs. They're all yelling and making noise and generally causing a ruckus. They were all shouting that "Fur is murder", "Animals have rights" and other fool things.
I tried to wiggle my way past them to go shopping and this young hooligan spits on my blouse.
Now I'm a pretty patient person and I don't like to make a scene, but that is not how you treat a lady! So I wave at him and change him into a pair of thermal socks. I didn't figure that anyone would notice with all the yelling and such, but sure enough some hairy arm-pitted girl starts screaming.
Being a witch you might imagine that I don't like angry crowds. Too many of us got all burnt up not so long ago (Hell, they burnt more mortals than us back then they got so crazy). So I start slapping spells right and left. Sadly one girl was carrying a big bucket of blood so when I made her into a nice warm quilt she was ruined as the blood spilled all over her. Such a pitty.
After that was all said and done I had a whole trunk full of new clothing. Too much of it was the wrong size or shape cause I was rushed by the addled nitwits. I did manage to make one of them into a wonderful mink coat! So it wasn't a complete waste. I took all of the clothes and things that didn't fit me to the local Good Will. I'm not a bad person.
I'll never understand people. Why is it with all the problems in the world today, young men and women feel the need to fool around with silly little causes like saving animals what don't even know what's going on. If they were smart they would try and save humans from getting turned into clothing by people like me. Of course that would make my life a lot harder, so in that case... Thanks PETA!
So anyway I head on down to this place I know of that sells fur and guess what. It's surrounded by a bunch of silly protesters with signs. They're all yelling and making noise and generally causing a ruckus. They were all shouting that "Fur is murder", "Animals have rights" and other fool things.
I tried to wiggle my way past them to go shopping and this young hooligan spits on my blouse.
Now I'm a pretty patient person and I don't like to make a scene, but that is not how you treat a lady! So I wave at him and change him into a pair of thermal socks. I didn't figure that anyone would notice with all the yelling and such, but sure enough some hairy arm-pitted girl starts screaming.
Being a witch you might imagine that I don't like angry crowds. Too many of us got all burnt up not so long ago (Hell, they burnt more mortals than us back then they got so crazy). So I start slapping spells right and left. Sadly one girl was carrying a big bucket of blood so when I made her into a nice warm quilt she was ruined as the blood spilled all over her. Such a pitty.
After that was all said and done I had a whole trunk full of new clothing. Too much of it was the wrong size or shape cause I was rushed by the addled nitwits. I did manage to make one of them into a wonderful mink coat! So it wasn't a complete waste. I took all of the clothes and things that didn't fit me to the local Good Will. I'm not a bad person.
I'll never understand people. Why is it with all the problems in the world today, young men and women feel the need to fool around with silly little causes like saving animals what don't even know what's going on. If they were smart they would try and save humans from getting turned into clothing by people like me. Of course that would make my life a lot harder, so in that case... Thanks PETA!
posted by MsMagnolia @ 8:55 PM
2 Comments:
At 5:52 PM,
M said…
I'm sure the needy thank you for your charity...but I do think that what you do is on a better level, ethically, than furriers. After all, the folks you turn into clothing aren't dead; with regular furs, you have to kill the poor critter that provides them.
(Hm...spending a month or two as a nice durable article like a jacket sounds pretty relaxing, actually...something for me to test if I ever get my hands on some shapeshifting ability.)
At 5:34 PM,
Jasufox said…
Well i'll have to agree with you there M
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